“Strong, Silent, and Suffering”: The Emotional Education Men Never Got
Most men aren’t taught how to care for their mental health. They’re taught how to perform masculinity.
From early childhood, boys are conditioned to embody a narrow version of manhood: be tough, don’t cry, stay in control. Vulnerability is treated as a liability, and tenderness as a threat. The result? A dangerous emotional straightjacket — one that leaves men silently suffering under the weight of feelings they were never allowed to name.
Pride is a Protest: Mental Health, Liberation, and Queer Resistance
It’s June, we hope to still see across cities and towns, the rainbow flags flying high, fluttering from windows and storefronts. Pride Month is a celebration — yes, but let’s never forget that it began as a protest. The first Pride was a riot by people who were tired of hiding, tired of policing themselves to survive.
Yes, You are probably stressed out. Here are Top 5 EASY Stress-Relief Techniques Backed by Science
When we feel stressed, our bodies go into "fight or flight" mode, a natural response that helps us deal with all kinds of danger and challenges in real time. Our brain automatically releases hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, which get our heart pumping faster, our blood pressure up, and our muscles tensed, all to get us ready for action.
Why Therapy Might Not Be Right for You
Honestly, at this point, everybody on IG, BlueSky, and their mamas swear by therapy these days. “Go talk to somebody.” “You need to heal.” And sure, therapy is powerful—it can change lives. But let’s be real: it’s not for everybody, at least, not all the time. So, before you book that first session, let’s talk about why therapy might not be what you need right now.
The Unseen Cycle: How Victims of Narcissistic Abuse Can Unintentionally Become Abusers
There’s a hard truth we don’t talk about enough: sometimes, survivors of narcissistic abuse can find themselves repeating the very behaviors that once harmed them. Not out of malice or intention—but out of unhealed trauma, fear, and learned survival strategies. It’s uncomfortable. It doesn’t fit neatly into victim/perpetrator binaries. But it’s real, and we need to talk about it.
No, It’s Not You—It Seems the Narcissists Have Taken Over
You’re not imagining it. The world does feel more chaotic, more selfish, more performative—and yes, more narcissistic. If you’re exhausted by people who seem allergic to accountability, allergic to nuance, allergic to basic relational respect, trust that. Your gut is not overreacting. You're living in the midst of a profound spiritual and socio-political reckoning.
Why Group Therapy Might Be the Right Choice for You
So, you’ve been in therapy for a while, and maybe you’re starting to feel like you’ve said everything there is to say. Perhaps the usual one-on-one sessions aren’t feeling as helpful as they used to, or you just don’t feel as connected to your therapist anymore. It’s totally normal to hit a bit of a wall in therapy sometimes. And if you’re starting to feel like that, you might be wondering if it’s time to switch things up. Ever thought about group therapy?
I know, the idea of sitting in a room with strangers and talking about your personal stuff can sound a little scary. But group therapy can actually be super helpful, and honestly, it might be just what you need right now. Here’s why.
When Attachment Styles Clash: Building Bridges in Intimacy
Our intimate relationships can be a place where your deepest insecurities and relational patterns emerge. Attachment styles—your subconscious blueprint for navigating intimacy—play a significant role in how you connect with others. When attachment styles clash between partners, the result can be a dance of misunderstandings, emotional triggers, and unmet needs.
You’re in Therapy… Maybe Your Child Needs It Too
Therapy isn’t just for adults. It’s a space for growth, healing, and breaking patterns—often ones you didn’t even realize were there. That’s a powerful journey. But what about your child? The one watching, absorbing, and moving through a world that doesn’t always make space for their emotions? It’s worth asking: Do they need therapy too?
The Hidden Costs of Chasing Perfection in Love
We see them.
The flawless Instagram relationships with fairy-tale endings of curated proposals and choreographed dances at weddings. Our IG/TikTok feeds are constantly flooded with images of couple goals, perfectly timed vacations, effortless communication, and partners who seem to meet every emotional need without fail.
But is this reality?
No. I’m not a hater but I’ve seen how the neverending pursuit of a perfect love story can often leave many clients feeling disillusioned, disconnected, and unfulfilled in the relationships that they do have.
Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and the Holiday Season
As the days grow shorter, many people may feel an inexplicable shift in their mood. While some of this can largely be attributed to changes in daylight, for others, it signals the onset of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). SAD is more than just feeling "the end of summer/ winter blues." It’s a legitimate form of depression that can impact your daily life. As we enter the holiday season—a time often depicted as joyful and celebratory—SAD can feel even more overwhelming. It’s really important that you understand this condition, along with why it happens and how it’s influenced by more than just the weather.
Honoring Nikki Giovanni’s Legacy of Growth and Humanity
Nikki Giovanni, a poet whose words and presence moved mountains. Born Yolande Cornelia Giovanni Jr. in 1943, she became a leading voice in Black Arts and Black Power movements. Her poems like Ego-Tripping and Knoxville, Tennessee captured the richness of Black life and imagination, blending sharp societal critique with deep personal insight. Giovanni’s book Love Poems won the NAACP Image Award, and her collection The Selected Poems of Nikki Giovanni is a testament to her range and brilliance. She wrote about love, justice, and everything in between with an honesty that resonates across generations. Nikki was also unapologetically queer, an aspect of her identity that enriched her work and underscored her courage to live authentically.
Why History Told Accurately Matters
Christopher Columbus, once regarded as a towering symbol of American heroism, is now widely recognized as a far more complicated and problematic figure. For generations, he was celebrated in the United States as the brave explorer who "discovered" America, his story woven into the fabric of national identity. However, this narrative conveniently set aside the brutal realities of colonization, disease, and devastation that followed his arrival. As more people confront the historical truths surrounding Columbus’s legacy, an important shift has begun to take place. Many are now rejecting the myths and choosing to honor Indigenous Peoples’ Day instead of Columbus Day, acknowledging the ongoing harm his legacy represents.
Redefining Success During the Holiday Season: Setting Boundaries with Family Expectations
The holiday season is often a time for you to connect with family and celebrate those familial connections with joy. However, for many of us, the holiday season can be a really stressful period, especially when it comes to the topic of family and setting healthy boundaries. In some households, setting boundaries may be really difficult. This season can challenge even the most centered among us as we navigate various struggles from your relatives’ expectations about how you “should” spend the holidays, subtle (or not so subtle) pressure to achieve certain milestones, or simply just old tensions resurfacing. This year, let’s redefine what success looks like during the holidays. It should not be based on meeting others' expectations but on staying true to ourselves.
Is It Still Important to Come Out for National Coming Out Day and Trans Remembrance Day?
I have had the privilege to witness many clients reflect on their personal journeys and support the navigation of their identities within a complex social context. Some have even asked if it is still important to come out. And “What if we live in a world where it’s okay to just be, where labels don’t need declarations and existence itself can be revolutionary?”
As a therapist, I can’t answer this but work with people to make their own determinations on what they might feel or believe given who they are, where they live, and what they understand about the world.
Entropy in Relationships — What is that?
Entropy in relational dynamics can be understood as the gradual breakdown of a relationship over time, especially if there is no effort to maintain or nurture it. Just as physical systems naturally move toward greater disorder, relationships—whether personal or professional—can become more disorganized or dysfunctional unless energy is put into maintaining communication, connection, and mutual understanding
How to have Life-Affirming Conversations
I saw an IG live post from Adrienne Marie Brown talking about “soft spaces” which is more fitting sometimes than the traditional concept of “safe spaces.” Brown emphasizes that a soft space is one where we can be vulnerable, where we can share our true selves without fear of judgment. In our conversations about mental health, creating these soft spaces means fostering a space where people feel they can open up without hesitation. It’s about being genuinely present, listening with empathy, and ensuring that the person feels accepted for who they are.
Uh Oh, It's Election Season and the Holidays. I Don’t Like Any of This Sh*t. It’s Too Much. What Should I Do?
Here it is. Election season and the holidays are a toxic blend of stress and chaos. It’s a perfect storm of political ads, end-of-year pressures, and family gatherings that feel more like debates than celebrations. It’s hard enough to manage either one of these on its own, but together? Who can blame anyone for just sitting at home and watching all three seasons of Is It Cake? on Netflix. The worst part? There's no escaping it or anyone who wants to discuss it. Whether you're scrolling through your social media feed, trying to enjoy a quiet dinner or going to the grocery store…, it’s like the world is determined to drag you into the mess of thoughts and opinions on all of it.
So, what should we do when we our mental health is fraying, and there’s no way to just opt out? Here’s a few tips.
With the Fall Brings… Cuffing Season
The air is cooling and the leaves are turning that red/russet, golden yellow so is our collective mood toward dating. It’s cuffing season, that time of year when the prospect of cozy nights snuggled up next to someone seems infinitely more appealing than braving the cold solo. But before we all rush into the comforting arms of a new relationship (or situationship), let’s pause and think about what we’re getting into.
Are You About That Drama? Let’s Talk Drama at Work
We all know that one person who turns every small situation into an epic, season-finale-worthy drama. The real question is: could you be that person? Before you jump to any conclusions (and maybe throw shade), let’s break down a common framework that helps us understand the role we play in creating drama in both life and work using the Karpman Drama Triangle.