Family Isn’t Always Safe: Setting Boundaries During Summer Visits

Family Isn’t Always Safe: Setting Boundaries During Summer Visits

The first time one of my clients — let’s call her Maya — decided not to attend her family’s annual reunion, she shared with me how anxious and conflicted she felt leading up to it. She barely slept the night before, her stomach in knots, guilt tangled with dread. She kept hearing her mother’s voice in her head: “You know how much this means to your grandmother.” But what was never spoken in her family was how emotionally exhausting these gatherings had become for her — the subtle jabs about her body, the persistent questioning about why she was still single, the way the room would go silent whenever she spoke up about something “too political.” She told me that each year, she left feeling smaller than when she arrived. That summer, for the first time, she chose herself.

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Redefining Success During the Holiday Season: Setting Boundaries with Family Expectations

Redefining Success During the Holiday Season: Setting Boundaries with Family Expectations

The holiday season is often a time for you to connect with family and celebrate those familial connections with joy. However, for many of us, the holiday season can be a really stressful period, especially when it comes to the topic of family and setting healthy boundaries. In some households, setting boundaries may be really difficult. This season can challenge even the most centered among us as we navigate various struggles from your relatives’ expectations about how you “should” spend the holidays, subtle (or not so subtle) pressure to achieve certain milestones, or simply just old tensions resurfacing. This year, let’s redefine what success looks like during the holidays. It should not be based on meeting others' expectations but on staying true to ourselves.

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