Why You Still Feel It: Trauma, the Body, and Whether EMDR Can Help
Written by: Tanisha Christie, LCSW (she/her)
Photo by ADU
You’ve been coming to therapy for a while. Talking about what has happened in the past, what continues to spark in your memory. You’ve been exercising, stopping drinking coffee, limiting alcohol, getting rest, spending time with friends, taking Instagram off your phone... doing all of the things and still….
Why does this $^%^&!! still affect me?
You might not even call it TRAUMA anymore.
You might call it stress.
Burnout.
Anxiety.
You’ve said in therapy… “It wasn’t even that bad.”
But you still can’t fully relax.
Your mind loops.
Your sleep is off.
You feel on edge or you feel nothing at all.
Trauma (and your response to it) is not a character flaw. It’s your nervous system’s response. And it doesn’t simply fade with time.
What Trauma Actually Is (and Why It Doesn’t Just Go Away)
Trauma isn’t just about what happened.
It’s about what your system couldn’t fully process at the time.
When something overwhelming occurs, your brain and body shifts into a survival mode:
fight, flight, freeze, or fawn / collapse.
Parts of your brain gets affected:
the amygdala, which detects threat and activates fear responses
the hippocampus, which helps organize memory into past vs present
the prefrontal cortex, which supports reasoning and regulation
When trauma isn’t processed, these systems don’t fully reintegrate the experience.
The memory stays emotionally and physiologically active.
So instead of feeling like:
“That happened back then”
Your body feels like::
“This is happening now.”
The brain doesn’t know time. That’s why time alone doesn’t resolve trauma.
Your body’s system isn’t stuck in the past because you’re weak. It’s stuck because it hasn’t had the chance to fully process.
Photo by Polina Zimmerman
Trauma in the Body
Trauma lives with you as you live and grow. Even if you don’t remember the incidents clearly. Your muscle memory and the adaptations do. It can look like:
chronic muscle tension (jaw, shoulders, chest)
fatigue that doesn’t resolve with rest
gut issues or appetite changes
dissociation or feeling disconnected
difficulty relaxing, even in safe environments
a constant sense of bracing or hypervigilance
These symptoms aren’t random. They are your nervous system holding incomplete survival responses.
Imagine you're driving and a car runs a red light, nearly hitting you. Your body instantly floods with adrenaline. Your heart pounds, hands grip the wheel you swerve to miss the crash. You’re safe but you keep driving because you can’t stop in the middle of the intersection, you’re late to work and you keep driving.
However your nervous system doesn’t have the chance to complete the response. Maybe if you had the chance to pull over, your hands shake, maybe you cry, or your breath comes back into your body in waves. That shaking and trembling is the discharge of that stress cycle. Your body physically completes the survival cycle having a chance to return to baseline.
But you didn’t get that. You show up to the meeting, take a breath and tell yourself I'm fine. The adrenaline in your nervous system doesn't disappear. The braced muscles don't release. The nervous system has filed in the file cabinet of your body that the threat is unresolved, because the survival response never got to finish.
Weeks later, you tense up every time you approach that intersection. Your shoulders creep toward your ears in traffic and you are startled at sounds you never used to notice. You feel on edge and don't know why.
The body has kept the score. This is why insight alone doesn’t always create relief.
Your body needs a way to process what your mind already understands.
Can EMDR Therapy work for me?
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a structured, evidence-based therapy designed to help the brain process and integrate traumatic memories. EMDR is based on what scientists have discovered with theAdaptive Information Processing (AIP) model, that the brain naturally moves toward healing even in those moments that trauma disrupts it.
EMDR’s use of bilateral stimulation (like guided eye movements or tapping), helps the brain
Reprocess stuck memories
Reduce emotional intensity
integrate experiences so they feel more like it had occurred in the past as opposed to those incidents feeling like that are happing in the present.
EMDR does not erase the memory but changes how it is held within your body.
When a memory is unprocessed, it stays “frozen” with the original emotions, body sessions and the belief about yourself intact. EMDR helps your brain revisit the memory and restore it in a way that’s not so overwhelming. So that overtime there is less emotional charge, and impact on your nervous system which would allow you to have more distance from the experience.
Photo by RDNE Stock Project
What happens in an EMDR session?
While EMDR is not just “talk therapy,”you are not forced to relive everything in detail. Instead sessions are about noticing thoughts, images and sensations that arise and allowing your brain to make connections to them. It’s true, some sessions might feel more activating if stronger material comes up. But in others you might feel more neutral or even energized. A good therapist will support you in tracking your nervous system the whole time only in the context of a memory.
EMDR is not a magic fix. It’s a process that can take time. Everyone’s experience is different but gradual change is noticed. What often occurs are:
the intensity of the memory decreases
triggers feel less overwhelming
your body becomes less reactive
While Talk therapy can help you:
understand patterns
build insight
develop language for your experience
EMDR focuses more directly on:
how trauma is stored in the brain and body
processing what hasn’t resolved
For many people, the combination of both is what actually creates change.
When EMDR Might Not Be the First Step
Not everyone can start with EMDR right away. If your nervous system feels consistently overwhelmed, the first phase of therapy may focus on:
building safety and stability
learning grounding and regulation skills
developing trust in the therapeutic relationship
This is especially important for people who have complex trauma, chronic stress environments or dealing with dissociation. It’s important to take the time not to isolate the trauma from context
Trauma is not just individual. It is relational, cultural, and systemic.
Many clients are carrying:
intergenerational trauma
racial trauma
Gender trauma
migration and displacement stress
survival patterns shaped by systemic oppression
These experiences live in the body as adaptation and while EMDR can be helpful it has to be practiced within the awareness of these layers.
People often come in thinking healing means:
not thinking about it
not feeling anything
being “over it”
But healing in the nervous system looks different.
It looks like:
your body no longer going into panic automatically
your reactions becoming less intense over time
your thoughts having more space and flexibility
feeling more present in your own life
You still remember. But you’re no longer being run by what happened.
EMDR may be a good fit if:
you’ve talked about something extensively, but it still lives in your body
your reactions feel automatic or hard to control
you notice patterns that insight alone hasn’t shifted
you want a structured way to process trauma
It may not be the first step but talking with a therapist about what might be right for you at this time is a good place to start because a lot of this is about understanding what your system actually needs at this time.
FAQ: Common Questions About EMDR
Does EMDR work for anxiety?
Yes—especially when anxiety is connected to past experiences or unresolved stress patterns.
Can EMDR make things worse?
It can feel activating at times, which is why pacing and therapist skill matter. Done well, it is titrated and contained.
Do I have to talk about everything in detail?
No. EMDR does not require full verbal disclosure of every detail.
How do I know if I’m ready for EMDR?
If you have some capacity to regulate and stay present, you may be ready. If not, that’s where therapy begins.
Tanisha Christie, LCSW (she/her) is the Founder and Practice Director who champions the liberation of individuals through the acknowledgement and affirmation of their stories. With a collaborative, holistic, and directive approach, Tanisha guides clients toward healing. Her extensive experience includes roles at Mount Sinai Hospital, the Ackerman Institute for the family and private practices, offering specialized expertise in polyamorous and couple relationships, executive coaching, and clinical supervision.